on finding happiness and "little cups of buttermilk"

So it has been awhile since I have written on my blog. It has been a busy few weeks, and as summer comes to an end, I am a little melancholy thinking about going back to teaching full time and being away from my guys. When I told Joseph there were only two weeks left of summer, he gave a little shudder. I know he is not looking forward to going back to school--getting up early, getting on the bus, completing homework--not the most fun for a teenager. Still, the routine of school is good for him, and I am trying to tell myself that the routine will be good for me--but I have my doubts.

I have had a wonderful summer. I have worked, but I have worked mostly when I felt like working. I have also been able to devote my days to my guys--well mainly Ronan--and then work at night when he is asleep. I have been able to stay up until the early hours of the morning hanging out with my husband, talking and watching movies, and dreaming about our future. These things make me happy.

As I think about happiness, I think it is important for people to realize that happiness is relative. My husband often quotes author Larry McMurtry who wrote about "little cups of buttermilk" in his famous novel Lonesome Dove. The little cups of buttermilk are the little things in life that make us smile, make us happy, keep us going. It is my belief that being happy in this world is just being able to focus on those little cups of buttermilk more than you focus on your struggles in life.

Everybody has a hard story. I think this. I had a tough childhood, but the more I listen to other people, the more I learn that most people have had very hard times in their lives at one point or another. Some people live with amazing amounts of tragedy. How do we do it? How do we live with such tragedy? How do we keep going? It has got to be the buttermilk.

With that in mind, I thought readers of this blog could think about their own little cups of buttermilk and think about what makes you happy. I have many, but these are a few...

seeing Ronan's sleepy smile in the mornings when he wakes up in a good mood

reading one of my husband's poems

reading one of his short stories

hearing a funny, witty joke from Joseph

going for a walk with my family

seeing the wild turkeys that run around our neighborhood

watching a good movie with my husband and then having a conversation where we analyze the writing, acting, plot, etc.

having my husband's strong arms around me in a random hug

making cupcakes and cookies for my guys (ok and myself too)

There seem to be so many more. I guess that is a good sign. I feel like such a fortunate person. Certainly, I have struggles, and some days seem darker than others, but I just try to keep my eyes toward the little things, the little things that can make life so good.

More later...